Showing posts with label utah. Show all posts
Showing posts with label utah. Show all posts

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Homesick but happy.

I got to walk around Salt Lake City last night. And the fact that the whole city wasn't dead and quiet by 10 o'clock made me so excited.

People were walking around and joking and laughing. There were random parties and concerts happening on street corners and in parks. And the people walking around weren't your normal -run-of-the-mill people. They had character and personality. It reminded me SO much of NYC. And I got a little homesick.

But then driving home late at night, I saw something wonderful. As you drive on the freeway and get to the edge of American Fork and Pleasant Grove, I drove over the hill and saw a beautiful sight. From way off to the side of the mountain, I got to see this: (Minus the line of light going up to it - this picture is kind of old. They light it up a different way now.)

And seeing this really isn't that big a deal. They light it up for the graduation ceremonies every semester and for homecoming in the fall. (They lit it up again tonight for the second night of graduation. I'm sitting here in my living room, and I love that I can see it from my couch.) But for some reason, it kind of hit me at this point how much I love being in Utah.

Yes, I love New York, and I always will. It is such an important part of my life and it is the place I dream about constantly because I miss it so so much. But, Utah is home. I live here now. And as much as I first hated coming out here to this strange world that is so completely different from NY, it has grown on me. I hated a lot of things about this place - mostly the fact that I wasn't really happy here.

But now, sometimes I can't bear to think of leaving it. As much as everything here can get chaotic and frustrating and seem so overwhelming, this is home. This is where my heart is now.

So last night just kind of made this transition feel so real. I saw SLC and loved it and missed NYC. But then that Y on the mountain just felt so right. Homesick and happy. Is that even possible? I guess so. And that's how I like it.