Homesick but happy.

I got to walk around Salt Lake City last night. And the fact that the whole city wasn't dead and quiet by 10 o'clock made me so excited.

People were walking around and joking and laughing. There were random parties and concerts happening on street corners and in parks. And the people walking around weren't your normal -run-of-the-mill people. They had character and personality. It reminded me SO much of NYC. And I got a little homesick.

But then driving home late at night, I saw something wonderful. As you drive on the freeway and get to the edge of American Fork and Pleasant Grove, I drove over the hill and saw a beautiful sight. From way off to the side of the mountain, I got to see this: (Minus the line of light going up to it - this picture is kind of old. They light it up a different way now.)

And seeing this really isn't that big a deal. They light it up for the graduation ceremonies every semester and for homecoming in the fall. (They lit it up again tonight for the second night of graduation. I'm sitting here in my living room, and I love that I can see it from my couch.) But for some reason, it kind of hit me at this point how much I love being in Utah.

Yes, I love New York, and I always will. It is such an important part of my life and it is the place I dream about constantly because I miss it so so much. But, Utah is home. I live here now. And as much as I first hated coming out here to this strange world that is so completely different from NY, it has grown on me. I hated a lot of things about this place - mostly the fact that I wasn't really happy here.

But now, sometimes I can't bear to think of leaving it. As much as everything here can get chaotic and frustrating and seem so overwhelming, this is home. This is where my heart is now.

So last night just kind of made this transition feel so real. I saw SLC and loved it and missed NYC. But then that Y on the mountain just felt so right. Homesick and happy. Is that even possible? I guess so. And that's how I like it.

wednesday wonders.

today was interesting. good and bad, with ups and downs. lots of downs, but really good ups. because it is the 12th, here are 12 things I learned from wednesday.

1. "If there's something wrong, those who have the ability to take action have the responsibility to take action." i believe it.
2. the tiles in the bathroom at my brother's house aren't really tan. they are purple. i just didn't realize that until after i scrubbed it for 2 hours.
3. the BYU bookstore can be talked into giving you an extra 20% (40% total!) off of all 48 pompoms, 24 footballs, and all 29 yards of fabric (etc.) that you have to purchase. it just requires that you climb up and down 3 levels of stairs repeatedly, go on a goose hunt for someone that doesn't really exist, and convince a lady named Nicole that you really are doing this for a good reason.
4. pinesol smells DEE-LISH. actually, I really like cleaning with it. when something smells so fresh like that, i'm more willing to scrub harder because i want the whole house to smell like it.
5. sometimes good things happen to good people.
6. mango flavored things make the days a little bit better.
7. BYU football and thursdays are exciting. :D
8. attitude is a matter of choice, not consequence.
9. land rovers are very roomy. they can fit 3 sets of golf clubs, 2 suitcases, 1 memorabilia football, 3 containers of random clothing/curtains, 2 boardgames, 1 lampshade, 3 college students, and lots of love.
10. relish the awkward moments. they make for awesome memories.
11. I have no Napoleonic dream. I'm just hard-working and pragmatic. ("pragmatic"=matter-of-fact/concerned with practical matters)
12. as long as you don't give up on me, i won't give up on you.

I'm on a boat

So I was on a boat last weekend. We woke up before the sun so that we could be on the lake before anyone else. And it was totally worth it! We had absolutely the most beautiful water. So glassy and perfect to wakeboard on. I haven't ridden on perfect water like that in a LONG LONG time. It was incredible.


And yet, I still managed to do something like this:




It kind of really really stung. And kept stinging after I'd gone and fallen again three more times.
Then, I decided to jump off the boat. But I got a lovely reward for trying to do it with a wakeboard on. :)



This picture is from 4 days later. It is so colorful!
All in all, it really was a fantastic trip that I now have a reminder of every time I raise my left arm. :) I just wish I could go every day.




20 days until school starts? where did summer go?

This only adds to how weird I am. Please, no judging me.... :)

I got the best surprise yesterday!!! (actually, I got a couple of them, but you only get to hear about one right now...)

I made a quick trip home. And sitting underneath the door mat was a lovely brown box.

And guess what this box had in it!!! (You will never guess. EVER. It's just not something you'd think that anyone would get in a package.)

I've been looking for these for forever. No joke. I even looked them up online and went to all the places that said they had them. And NO ONE had any.

So, I took matters into my own hands. :)
And this is what I got:


These are so convenient. How can you NOT want some?
Plus, they're good for you. :)

Stuff you probably don't need to know about me... but here you go anyways...

Alisa tagged me in this on FB. So, of course I'm putting it here. For some reason, I'd rather put it here than on there.

1. What time did you get up this morning?
6:45

2. How do you like your steak?
For dinner. Medium rare.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
UP!

4. What is your favorite TV show?
I’m currently stuck on Psych. :)

5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?
In a house.

6. What did you have for breakfast?
FUZE juice. And now I want a bagel.

7. What is your favorite cuisine?
Ooooh, anything ethnic. Mexican, Chinese, Thai, Ethiopian, Indian, etc. And yet, whenever I crave something, it is usually a hamburger.

8. What foods do you dislike?
mustard.

9. Favorite Place to Eat?
Candlelight (or the Little Corner Mexican Restaurant.)

10. Favorite dressing?
Any vinagrette.

11.What kind of vehicle do you drive?
Grover the gas-guzzling Land Rover. He’s a beast and I love him.

12. What are your favorite clothes?
Scarves.

13. Where would you visit if you had the chance?
Anywhere and everywhere. I love traveling.

14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full?
I’m working on looking at the full side of life.

15. Where would you want to retire?
Anywhere with a front porch that has a rocking chair with my name on it. I’m not too picky.

16. Favorite time of day?
When the sun comes up and when the sun goes down.

17. Where were you born?
Orem.

18. What is your favorite sport to watch?
Fooootball. European and American.

19. Bird watcher?
Nope. People are much more interesting - especially at airports and malls.

20. Are you a morning person or a night person?
Mmm night. But mornings aren’t so bad anymore...

21. Do you have any pets?
After the loss of Lebron, I would love another puppy, but not just yet. So instead, we got some fish that we are currently trying to get rid of. Any takers? I’m pretty sure they’ll die if they stay with us.

22. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share?
I successfully returned my DVD at Redbox! Other than that..... nope, not really.

23. What did you want to be when you were little?
A lifeguard. And I fulfilled my career goal at the age of 15. Who else can say they accomplished that?!

24. What is your best childhood memory?
The ice cream cones from Macey’s we got on daddy-daughter dates.

25. Are you married?
Nope.

26. Always wear your seat belt?
YES.

27. Been in a car accident?
Yes? - But not with another car.

28. Any pet peeves?
Open cupboard doors – I got it from my mother.

29. Favorite Pizza Toppings?
anything but anchovies.

30. Favorite Flower?
lilies. And gardenias. :)

31. Favorite ice cream?
cookies and cream right now. I’m sure I’ll move on to another one soon.

32. Favorite fast food restaurant?
the whopper jr. is the greatest $1 burger in America.

33. How many times did you fail your driver's test?
None! The usually failed people at the New Ro one, but I took it in White Plains. HA!

38. From whom did you get your last email?
my Cambodian brother

39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
TARGET. Hands down.

40. Do anything spontaneous lately?
Backflipped off the wake sufboard. Because I had to show someone up. :) Other than that, the Saturday before last was pretty spontaneous.

41. Like your job?
LOVE it. 2 years and counting.

42. Broccoli?
yes, please.

43. What was your favorite vacation?
Any road trip with Christian. And Florida with Carol. And the South Dakota ones.

44. Last person you went out to dinner with?
David.

45. What are you listening to right now?
Adele – ‘crazy for you’‘. She’s got an incredible voice. And that song just ended – so now it’s ‘daydreamer’.

46. What is your favorite color?
I’m kind of slightly obsessed with dark purple right now.

47. How many tattoos do you have?
None. My star that I drew on my hand washed off yesterday in the lake...

49. What time did you finish this quiz?
8:43 a.m.

50. Coffee Drinker?
More like a coffee smeller.

boating!

to me, this is the epitome of summer - carefree, relaxing, sunshine, water, friends, fun.
what else could there be to distract me and pull me back to the real world? NOTHING.

(Yes, I stole this picture.)

today I did one of these:
,
while riding one of these:

while being pulled behind a red one of these:


The first time was closer than the second. I almost had it the second time, too.


I will be very sad when I can no longer do any of the above
because my foot will have one of these:


september 4th = no more boating.
no more boating = summer is over.
ergo, september 4th means summer is over.

that will be a sad, sad day.

Happiness is all around you, laughing with you, and loving you.

I think growing up with 10 kids in my family has made me love being surrounded by people. Moving to Utah was one of the hardest things for me to do because I had to go from having 9 or so people in the same house with me to none. It was kind of depressing. Okay, it was really depressing. I missed having both Anna and Emma come sleep with me after they'd woken up in the middle of the night (Thank you, Dad, for telling them to go sleep with me, instead of letting them crawl in with you). So, I solved that problem. I got two extra big pillows to sleep with, besides my regular one. And I put one between me and the wall, and the other I snuggle with. And then everything is just dandy! Still not quite the same thing, but definitely a lot closer.
But pillows aren't exactly the most animated.

So I've tried to convince la roommate to get a pet.
I wanted a kitten, she vetoed. She wanted a rabbit, I vetoed.

(speaking of cats:
I made a new friend last night! And he almost followed me home. I had to run a couple blocks to escape his interest. He looked a little like this:

I named him Felix. But sadly, sadly, someone in my apartment would have regretted my bringing my new friend home with me. But their allergies would have loved me. LOVED me.)

Alas, since Felix will not be joining our household, we have instead agreed to the open adoption of two aquatic creatures that will be moving in momentarily. They might already have names? If not, I want to name one Sergei and the other Hosea... or maybe Nina?

Anyways, I'm pretty stoked.

Some are scared to fly so high. Well, this is how we have to try - have no envy, no fear. j.radin

"One day you will feel like you know what you are doing."

That is the piece of wisdom I read today while getting my daily fill of the news. And my first thought was 'Really? I don't believe it.' I think the older I get, the more I realize I don't know. I've been blessed to be working at the same job for the past 2 years. And I do know a lot.

My list of accomplishments from this job include (but definitely are not limited to): interior design, prop building, binder assembling, becoming a copy-making fiend, preparations dances, scheduling - then re-scheduling - a building, computer hacking skills, repair skills-including anything from pool cues to printers, safety and security, and teaching my managers how to call people anonymously, etc....
But, as comfortable and confident as I sometimes feel, I still don't know everything. Most of the time, I can find the answer to a question and help someone, but there are still a lot of things that I don't know.

Well, today I realized that I already knew the most important thing about my job. I know how to help someone. Even if I don't know the answer. A big part of having a job like mine, at least to me, is your customer service. I think it's HUGELY important - the way you treat people is the reflection of the love and respect you have for them. Especially when you don't know them.

Today, while trying to track down a lost order from our supplier's warehouse, the girl on the other end of the phone wasn't being particularly helpful. Anyways, after talking to her for a while and then being put on hold for at least 15 minutes, I realized that there was no point in me getting frustrated at her. It didn't help anyone. Least of all me. And maybe talking on the phone with her and letting her figure things out will help her become more able to help another customer faster and more easily the next time around.

I guess everything we do comes from a choice. And I just want to choose to be happy. I like being happy. So even if I never ever feel completely confident in myself, even if I never learn anything else, that is all I need to know - everything we do comes from a choice. And we can choose to be happy.


And in regards to that, I do need to work on being happier. No more disgruntled grumpiness in the mornings was step one. Although, I'm doing an okay job, right Kinsey?

That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do; not that the nature of the thing itself is changed, but that our power to do it has increased.
- Heber J. Grant

I'm conquering dragons. How about you?

So today I found this:

Fairy tales are more than true: not because they tell us dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be defeated.
- g.k. chesterton

I can remember wanting to be a princess when I was little. I wanted to find a white horse and ride off into the sunset. I wanted to live in a tower in a land that was perfect. I wanted the pretty dresses and long flowing hair. I wanted to be able to talk to animals, to sing with birds. I wanted carriage rides and tiaras.

And now that I know that princess school does not actually exist, this is the kind of princess I want to be:

That girl knew what she was doing. Thank you, Princess Elizabeth, for being on my list of heroes. My dragon may not be your dragon, but you showed me that I can beat mine - without a sword, a suit of armor, or a horse.

I didn't stick with the plan.

There are so many scenarios where this applies.

1. Football. 4th down and yards to go, told to punt. Bypassed logic and just went for it instead.

2. Kitchen. Supposed to follow the directions explicitly to the letter. Didn't. Chose gut feeling instead.

3. Work. List of things to do and not to do. Ignored the whole thing. Rewrote my own list instead.

4. School. Knew the "proper" way to get the answer. Disregarded it. Did it my own way instead.

5. Life. Kissed my best friend. Wasn't planning on it. Kissed him anyways.


And I hope I just didn't ruin one of the best things I ever had.